Saturday, 31 March 2012

ON SALMON FISHING AND CHILDREN

The Wild Atlantic Salmon
There's a trailer doing the rounds for a film out shortly: 'Salmon Fishing in the Yemen.'  I drifted into a charity shop on Monday and quite by chance saw the book there and bought it.  And then consumed two afternoons sitting in this week's glorious sunshine reading it. A most marvellous book, combining the mysteries of migratory fish with high (and Middle Eastern) politics. 

I recommended the book in turn to a friend who used to be a UNESCO colleague and who is a marine biologist and without quite realising what was happening we had an exchange of emails that could have come straight out of the book (which is full of emails).  He told me that there had been attempts to introduce Atlantic salmon in all sorts of places and that the farming of Atlantic salmon was now established in places such as Patagonia and Chile.  Indeed, he told me, that salmon had been released in a Chilean river and had returned to spawn, though the reproduction, for some reason, had not been successful and the authors of the project had returned to fish farming.  I would have thought (in line with the book) that sport fishing would have brought in more income than commodity salmon fish farming and, moreover, would have been less harmful ecologically.  That must remain a subject for debate. 

Salmon fishing is something that hooks you, if you will excuse the pun and though I last caught a salmon forty-two years ago on the river Conon near Dingwall in the north of Scotland whither my grandfather used to invite me and my sister to fish,  the romance of the noble fish and its capture has never left me.  He, my grandfather, was always a great fisherman and in his spare time became a Professor of Obstetrics and Gynaecology at Edinburgh University.  In one memorable (and just possibly apocryphal) three day period he was summoned to three grand houses where the wife of the laird lay in the throes of childbirth.  All three babies took adequate periods of time to arrive; adequate anyway for him to change into his fishing gear and take himself off to the river (of course there weren't such things as mobile phones in those days) and catch a salmon.  Then he would come back and deliver the baby.  His account at the end of three days thus read: three babies, three salmon, three thousand guineas.

Yes, a thousand guineas was the fee apparently for delivering a baby in those pre-war days.  It seems a very great deal, (maybe £50,000 now?) which is another reason for wondering whether the story - like all fishermen's tales - may have been 'stretched' - a little.   Nor do I know the identity of any of the babies, though I do know that he delivered Magnus Magnusson.

Magnus (who will forever be identified with the upmarket Quiz Show 'Mastermind') once found himself in the spotlighted Black Chair, facing questions himself.  He was asked, he once recounted, quite a simple question: 'What was the name of Marilyn Monroe's first husband?'  But although he knew the surname was 'Miller' - the first name that intruded into his thoughts was 'Douglas,' rather than the correct 'Arthur.'  Afterwards he said that he had had a total blackout and had found it impossible to think of any Miller but his mother's doctor (my grandfather) who had by this time become a family friend.

One consequence of the fine weather is that children want to play outside and not only outside but with water as well.  Theo, my grandson of three, had invited his little friends - boy of three and girl of five - around to play and watering the garden while supervising adults tried to engage in a sensible pastime of a summer afternoon glass of Vouvray in the shade of an ivy hedge.  I think everyone enjoyed themselves, though the plants seemed to receive precious little water most of which found its way into the children's clothes.  This might bode well for a potential future career as fisherfolk.

As the Vouvray seemed to have gone down well I made some canapés of humous and paté and meanwhile finding the children some interesting activity indoors.   Recently I have been removing from the shelves reels of old labels that had lost most of their stickiness (labels do have a shelf-life).  But these actually make excellent playthings.  While we adults were enjoying the sunshine, the children, gone quiet for a moment, had decided to 'paper' and when we looked again the hallway was a mass of fluorescent yellow labels, that fortunately, having lost their adhesive power, came off easily.

I'd like now to bring this blog to a tidy close by reporting that we all then sat down to a dish of fresh rod caught Atlantic salmon.  But we didn't.  I fear sadly that my grandfather will prove to have been altogether more efficient as a guide in the salmon fishing department than I will ever be to young Theo.  The Atlantic Salmon is under great threat from fishery of the stock on the high seas and from the capture in vast quantities of the sand eels and other minor forms of marine life on which it feeds for processing into fish meal.  When Theo grows up the sight of wild salmon leaping in British rivers may long be a thing of the past.  If you'd like to know more have a look at the Atlantic Salmon Trust    website from where I have taken the photograph at the head of this piece.














Tuesday, 27 March 2012

LONDON WEEKEND

Rich experiences last weekend, which we spent in London visiting some very old friends who now live in Surbiton.  The Friday afternoon journey down proved tedious owing to an accident on the M3 (although clearly more tedious for those involved whose cars looked pretty mangled); still we arrived safely, but no sooner had we had a refreshing cup of tea than we were off again, driving into town and parking in Piccadilly to see the Hockney exhibition for which (being members of the Royal Aacademy) our friends were able to get us tickets without the hassle of queuing.

I'd like to say that I like looking at Hockney's paintings, which in the main are very large and very bright and often of the same landscapes.  But if the test of an artwork is whether you could live with it, then I only counted four paintings (out of maybe a hundred) to which I would have given houseroom. With the hordes of people milling around, the vast interest this exhibition has attracted and the hushed tones in which people speak of Hockney, I couldn't personally help feeling that there was an element of the Emperor's New Clothes about this display.  But still, as a phenomenon, it was interesting. And, for someone like me who knew very little of Hockney before, educational.  I was grateful and glad we had gone.

The following morning posed less of an assault on the visual senses: we went to Henry VIII's Royal Palace of Hampton Court to which I had never been and where I would have been happy to stay the whole day if not the whole week. (I am sure an enterprising down and outer could manage to hide away somewhere in the warren that is the Palace and live perpetually in some royal cupboard, perhaps posing as someone or other, practically in perpetuity).  The spring sun shone, there weren't too many crowds and buildings and gardens did really look very beautiful.  Tudor lords and ladies occasionally dropped in too so that for me it even felt a little bit like coming home as I did once play Cardinal Wolsey on stage.  This wasn't however enough to get me in for free.

So back then to a (very) late lunch for family and grandchildren.  Our friends' daughters are just a little younger than our own and grandchildren don't change very much wherever you go.   A most pleasant walk along the Thames followed, we watching the rowers and scullers and the passenger boats that ply a trade along the river. 

Needing a rest in the evening we all set off to see a film: 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' which I can thoroughly recommend to anyone who likes a heart-warming, life-affirming story, being the one selected.  It made me cry and laugh in equal measure and as the cast includes Maggie, Smith, Judy Dench, Bill Nighy and a host of other stars all acting naturally and not trying to be edgy or violent,  watching them provided an acting masterclass.  It is a superb film, though, naturally, panned by the critics.

On Sunday we all drove over to Dulwich to see more old friends who had tickets for an exhibition of Van Dyck's paintings at the Dulwich Gallery.  At the same time the gallery was hosting a second exhibition of 'Ragas' - little Indian paintings about the size of an iPad - made three or four hundred years ago to accompany pieces of music and song - an early form of music video, I suppose, though these paintings didn't move.

Having had by then our daily shot of culture we adjourned to lunch or rather to a glass of champagne in the garden sunshine before sitting down, eight of us, to a splendid piece of roast beef.  After which our host, who is a bit of a wine buff, decided we should have a tasting of dessert wine to accompany the cheese and pudding. For each of us he produced six glasses into which he poured six dessert wines which we then had to link with a grape variety and a wine growing country or region.  We all did very badly, I am sad to say, but I appeared to have done slightly less badly than the others and so was awarded a history of Pol Roger as a prize for my efforts.

Then back round the South Circular to Surbiton and, after tea, back again down the M4 (we avoided the M3 this time) to Wales, noting that the Bridge tolls have increased again.  Anyway a most interesting and productive weekend.

The picture is of Hampton Court Bridge from Hampton Court Palace.  In the foreground of the picture to the right, there is (though you probably can't see it) a pigeon that had waded out into the river and was giving itself a bath like a duck. It was actually swimming but it wouldn't have taken more than a passing ripple to have lifted it off the bottom.














Saturday, 3 March 2012

A NOVEL EXPERIENCE

Squizzey - the bestest little grey squirrel in the world
"Why don't we meet," she suggested - "seeing as you live close by?"

"Why not?" I answer.  See you next Wednesday!  And lo! it came to pass that I met the lovely Kathryn Eastman from the Nut Press in Cowbridge's newly opened Costa Coffee shop this week.

But that wasn't all - oh no -  for who should have come along as well but Squizzey - 'the bestest little grey squirrel in the world' (though he does have a tendency to say so himself) - the cool dude with his name on his blue polo shirt.

He sat on the table, playing umpire as Kath and I drank cappuccinos.  Ominously I think he was taking notes.  He has a blog as well which you can find here.

Now it seems a universal experience that whenever blogging friends meet they find - not that they are total strangers meeting for the first time - but that somehow they have become old friends already, with a great deal in common and even more to talk about.  Thus it was with Kath.  She had sensibly suggested we exchange photographs, but I would have known her instantly the moment she walked in through the door.  Two hours flew by and I'm sure we might have continued for another two hours had life not got in the way.  But we have plans to meet again and continue where we left off. 

Kath has a lot of advice to give and she was most helpful in suggesting websites and publications that I might look at to develop my own writing.  Since entering a couple of stories for the Choc-Lit Short Story Competition in January, I seem to be beset by competitions.  I sent off a story about learning to drive in February to one Writers' Group that I have recently joined.  There's another local competition in connection with the Cowbridge Book Festival, but the biggest current challenge is the Good Housekeeping/Orion Books competition for an unpublished novel.  Write a chapter of about 5,000 words and a synopsis and get it to us by 31 March, they say.

I have never written a novel and have no idea whether I could write one, but - a bit like climbing a mountain - I'd very much like to try and having a competition like this is a great spur.  (I discount entirely any chance of winning: the competition is useful only in that it provides a pressing deadline).

If I find, thanks to this competition, that I can scribble out one tolerable chapter and synopsis, then I might conclude that it might be worth continuing for a few more chapters.  I have found myself thinking more and more about the interesting characters in my Choc-Lit story and asking what happened to them before they met (and what will happen to them afterwards) and who all the other people are that flip the levers of their particular pin-ball game.  Thus has evolved, I told Kath, a wider, more complex story: part romance, part history, part thriller and set partly in St Petersburg, the most northerly metropolis in the world and capital of the Tsars.

Conceiving the synopsis and sketching out these initial 5,000 words has been fun.  Fun because,  if you will excuse the pun, it is, for me, a novel experience.  It is fun because I have no idea of how I should proceed, so the learning curve is steep and challenging.  No two novels are the same, it seems,  even if they are by the same authors.  Some are descriptive, some are personal, some go on inside the protagonists' heads, some are like film scripts. The canvas of the blank page can, I admit, be terrifying, but to me it is like a seaside cove to a child, filled with rock pools in which lurk all manner of exciting wildlife.  I have only to close my eyes and my characters are there telling me what to write down.  In both cases there are so many unknown things waiting to be discovered. 

In some ways it has been remarkably easy, compared to what I am used to.  When you are writing non-fiction you have to find something to say that is reasonably researched and true, or at the very least have an opinion about something that is reasonably true. If you are writing fiction on the other hand, if you do not know what to say you can just make it up.  For that's the thing about fiction, as someone said once, it doesn't happen. 

I'm also finding it fun to be able to make characters do things.  Having directed plays I try to make the actors appear in a certain light and present their personalities in the way I want.  This doesn't always succeed: the actor may be stubborn or I may fail to make him do what I want.

What a relief then to know that as a writer I have the power - should I so wish it - to make my characters turn somersaults in at the door, or to stand on their heads, or to present an angry, a facetious or a woebegone face to the world whenever I so decree;  I can dress them however I desire, even make them appear in shining armour, and move them back and forth in time.  (Virginia Woolf did this with Orlando.  Poor soul, he found himself being dragged through four hundred years and changing gender in the process). I don't think I'll go quite that far,  but it's nice to know that one can. 

"How's it going to end?" asked Kath.  At this point, Squizzey, who had started to look a little bored as I had rambled on, pricked up his ears and licked his pencil. 

"I don't know," I said, and here I looked directly at the Squirrel.  "For it may of course never end, in the sense that the story may languish still-born at the end of the first chapter.  In one sentence I may move everything two hundred years into the past and give everyone cholera and that will be that."  Oh, the power!

But if I should ever get to chapter seventeen, eighteen, nineteen: what then?  I just don't know.  (Well maybe I do know - sort of - but that far ahead the crystal ball is still a little cloudy).  I hope nevertheless that it will all end happily.  For the goodies anyway.  Baddies (and there are some) will just have to take their luck where they find it and hope they catch me on a good day.

(Otherwise they might just end up being liquidated by squirrels).